Dir. Ron Carlson, USA , 2009, 85 mins
Cast. Gary Coleman, Jordan Prentice
Review by Michelle Moore
Comedy is a funny thing. Everyone is amused by something different, from talking animals to Jim Carrey. In the case of Midgets vs. Mascots , most of the humour comes from the plot itself. Two people are up to inherit a lot of money but, before they can, they are challenged to find five little people and five mascots and pit them against each other in some of the strangest of tasks. ‘Why these two very different groups?’ you may ask. Apparently, the deceased had a soft spot both for small people and for those in outsized costumes.
The resulting “documentary” shows what happens during the competition. It starts with the auditions to find the fab five on each side, which includes the late Gary Coleman in his last movie appearance. The teams run an obstacle course, which means watching mascots dressed as pizza and tacos, a bunny, crocodile, cow and a bigheaded sheriff trip, tumble and roll. At the rodeo they chase pigs and attempt to ride a bull. Then there is a “how many punches can you get in a gay bar through insults” task. The funniest, and maybe the most disgusting, however, is the lactose intolerant small lady who participates in a milk-drinking contest with very smelly results.
There is no trick photography or CGI , and no special effects or 3D effects in this movie. This appears to be a documentary – the events seem to be a complete surprise to the surrounding public when they take place. In one scene, in a restaurant, insults fly around the table and the looks on the faces of those on surrounding tables are a picture of horror at what they are hearing. Accompanying the best bits of the movie are classic songs such as ‘Stuck in the Middle with You’ by Steelers Wheel and ‘You’re the Best’ by Joe Esposito, which work perfectly where they are placed.
The most disappointing aspect of the movie is the lack of appearance from Jay and Silent Bob star Jason Mews. Although the marketing uses his name to promote the film, his appearance is limited to one line in the last segment. There are plenty of laughs and some more disgusting moments, but Midgets Vs. Mascots is not enough good quality in terms of jokes or memorable moments to really merit a cinema release. Straight to DVD would have been sufficient.
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